Blue-footed Boobies

Potty humor. It's like the annoying and persistent smell that lingers in our kitchen garbage that has seen too many dirty diapers and brown banana peels. I can ban any subject bum-related, and yet it's as though potty humor has a life of its own, worming its way back through the very pores of my children and finding astonishingly funny and legitimate ways to offend.

Take, for example, the word booty. It's no butt (also banned in our house), but it's just so...raw. And unnecessary. I'm not entirely sure Jannika even knows booty is on the banned list, so it is amazing how often she prefers to use it in everyday conversation, but legitimately. "See? This is my pirate ship, and here's the pirate's booty. He keeps his booty in this treasure chest. His booty is super shiny. See this booty?" It's hard-wired.

And then we have pss. Nope, not a typo. Last week she mothers Silas with a "Let's put some pss in the potty, OK?" And then at my shocked expression and not-very-well-disguised probing of "Hmmm, where did that word come from?" she explained, "You know, psssss, like the sound pee makes." But I must have revealed the oh-so-tantalizing nature of what I thought she actually said, because then we had three straight days of "Hold on, mom, I have to pss." All of which I dutifully ignored until the novelty wore off...at least for the next ten years, hopefully.

Or the word booby. Again, at this point in their little lives, conversations about boobies are just...overkill? Fine, I know I sound archaic, but my kids spend way too much of their day naked (hey, it's hot here and I refuse to turn on the AC until it's 90 inside) to start giggling conversations about boobies all. day. long. Which is what will happen. I know my children. However, know how little miss smarty pants gets around it? Booby traps and Blue-footed Booby birds. Seriously. Props to The Little Einsteins for these two gems. OK, so the Blue-footed Booby only appears in one episode, but...come ON. Of all the species of animals - you know the writers were snickering. Booby traps, however, appear on every other episode. And then in conversations with Jannika's friends. And then again in Jannika's play. And then again in Jannika's drawings. My life is currently filled with booby traps. For the love! Oh, she knows.

And somehow she knows...without knowing. It's a mystery to me. So imagine my delight at, out of ALL the animals in the animal kingdom, the introduction of the latest animal premiered on PBS Kids' Wild Kratts: the sperm whale.

And I'll just leave it at that.